To create calm, we have to become intentional. When we get intentional about creating a calm environment, we can better cope with the upheaval going on in the world.
The world is currently in a chaotic state.
From the global devastation of COVID-19 to the grief, horror, and widespread protests set off by the killing of George Floyd, to the push for more diversity and inclusion, the world is reeling with chaos.
We’re witnessing the most disease the world has seen in a very long time. As individuals, we can’t be untouched by what we’re seeing and hearing and imagining. Everything that is happening around us is affecting us in some way.
What we can do is make our home a haven – both our inner home of the mind and the home we live in.
But how do we create calm in our homes when the outside world is in such turmoil?
The first step is to stop dwelling on the negative.
We all desire to continue being leaders and influence others for the better, but dwelling on fearful, negative, stressful thoughts and images doesn’t support this desire.
Not only does it make you miserable, but it also weakens your immune system. This is why bringing calm into your home is so important.
But there is also another reason.
When you take the steps needed to create calm in your home, you’re leading by example. You’re teaching family members how to rise above stress and anxiety. This is what being a positive influencer (the central message of my book The Tao of Influence) is all about.
The Tao of Influence lays out a path—rooted in the ancient wisdom of the 4,000-year-old Tao Te Ching—that allows us to identify and break the “power patterns” that undermine your influence, create dysfunctional relationships, and otherwise squelch your potential.
Examples of power patterns include:
- Judgement
- Blame
- Control
- Victimhood
- Martyrdom
By overcoming these “power patterns”, we can create stronger, more positive versions of ourselves that can influence others and also help us create calm in the world around us.
At my speaking events, I talk about how when you do the work needed to overcome your power patterns, you’re building habits that create an inner sense of calm. That sense of calm will naturally permeate your home and impact the way your family experiences daily life.
Building those habits involves paying attention to your thoughts and emotions and getting intentional about your daily routines. Here are six steps to get you started creating a calm home:
6 Steps to Create Calm in Your Home
1. Start the day with a calming morning routine.
Do you wake up a little early so you can enjoy some relaxing time to yourself? Or do you sleep as late as possible and then rush to get everything together for your family or work obligations?
Try setting your alarm a half-hour earlier (which may mean getting to bed earlier as well). In this bonus time, you can journal, sip a cup of coffee, pray, or meditate. Also, set a positive intention for the day ahead.
Starting your day on a positive, calm note will set the tone for the day. Remember: you get back the energy you put out during the day. If you start your day on a negative note, it is very likely that the rest of your day will continue on that wavelength.
2. Decide what a “calm home” means to you, then express it through your surroundings.
Is a “calm home” happy, fun, joyful, out-of-the-box, connected, or something else?
Find ways to start bringing that feeling into reality.
For example, if you want to fill your home with the energy of love, you might add candles, essential oils, salt lamps, or prayer beads.
For me, a calm, peaceful home means I have lots of windows to let in the light, white walls, and no clutter. I intentionally don’t own a lot of stuff, and my mantra is “less is more.” The world is ready for simplicity, not further complexity exacerbated through excess belongings.
3. Do some spring cleaning
A great way to create calm in your home is to clean up and get rid of clutter.
A messy space at home contributes to a disorganized and chaotic mind. But if we can take small steps toward establishing stillness on the outside of us, we can experience more internal peace, wellness, and harmony within.
If you haven’t already done so, take advantage of the extra time you may have at home to clean and organize your space to promote balance and stillness. Once your home is organized, you will find a sense of comfort and relaxation that may not have been there before.
#4. …and include your thoughts, not just your possessions.
Your home is comprised of “stuff,” and all of that “stuff” contains the energy of your thoughts.
Think about this carefully: are you filling your home with stressful thoughts? And what are you doing that reinforces those thoughts?
Spring cleaning might also mean turning off the news and calling a moratorium on social media. No question those in your house can feel the energy of your thoughts. Our energy and thoughts can be felt by everyone around us, and by changing the energy of your thoughts, we can help the people around us too.
I remember the year before going through a divorce, I went into my five-year-old son’s bedroom to check on him while he was sleeping. He was talking in his sleep and I heard him say, ‘Mommy is sad.’
I never told him I was sad, and I didn’t cry in front of him, because at the time I believed it was better to hide those things.
But my thoughts were sad, and he picked up on it. Your thoughts are present in the very fabric of your home.
#5. Once you are aware of negative thoughts, release them.
Don’t dwell on your negative thoughts.
When a negative or fearful thought crosses your mind, release it and watch it energetically drift out of your home and dissolve into Mother Earth.
Several times each day, ask yourself, What am I holding on to at this moment that could be released?
Our minds tend to latch onto negative feelings, and we let them take over our emotions. Instead of feeding off of these feelings, just let them go. You’ll be surprised by how much better it can make you feel, and how much healthier it is for your overall psyche.
Learn how to let go of your worrying or your negative thoughts (you can learn more about how to do that here). Encourage each of your family members to release thoughts in this same way, too.
#6. Fully feel your emotions.
Your thoughts and emotions are meant to move through you like a wave that arrives and then dissipates. After you completely feel them, replace them with empowering thoughts that generate peace. For example, I am so thankful for the opportunity to practice letting go of this situation.
Every time you are grateful and accept a situation, it calms your mind, thereby calming your body, impacting those around you, and the energy of your home.
It may be an unstable world outside of your home, but choosing what you allow inside yourself and your living space is a radical act of love and empowerment for you and your family.
Make your environment a place of nurture and safety, and you will feel more grounded and in control, even in these troubled times. In this way, you’ll influence your family, community, and the world in positive and meaningful ways.
For more ways to create calm and train your mind to be peaceful in chaotic times, visit www.KarenMcGregor.com to pick up your copy of The Tao Of Influence today and receive complimentary training to support your journey.
For more tips on how to take a step back from toxicity in the home and the workplace, click here.
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